For anyone advised to use Magnesium Citrate (MC) to prep for your colonoscopy, here is a little glimpse of your prep life from 4pm --> the next morning!
The directions I received were to buy three 10 oz. bottles of (MC) from any over the counter pharmacy. So, went to CVS a few days before and found the mixture easily and paid less then $10 for 3 lemon flavored glass bottles. That was a pleasant surprise!
OK, so the day of prep arrives. At 4pm, 7pm and 9pm I had to down one of those seemingly small 10oz. glass bottles of MC. I was planning to play volleyball that night, so I was hoping that it would be a quick in and out deal (Yeah, yeah, so I didn't do any research about the prep before starting). After the first sip at 4pm, my lips puckered and one of those feelings of something destroying the enamel on every tooth in my mouth came into play. I don't drink a lot of liquids in one sitting, but I just forced myself to down this as fast as possible. Shortly after, severe nausea and a raging headache kicked in and I felt like I was going to die. I can usually take uncomfortableness and relax on the couch, but I wanted to be in my sleeping quarters.
My roommate and a friend came home shortly after and I asked her to look at the MC b/c she's a dentist and knows different drugs. I needed to know if this was a normal reaction to MC. After looking at the directions, the last line read, mix with ginger ale. Of course, the stomache calming part that I overlooked and deemed unimportant.
I immediately went to the store and got 2 bottles of ginger ale for the next two 10oz. doses of MC.
WHAT A DIFFERENCE!
WARNING:
ALWAYS MIX THIS STUFF WITH GINGER ALE!
The nausea was down to a tolerable level, but I just felt ill. No volleyball for me!
Shortly after the 7pm dose, that's when the firework began! I never knew the power and capabilities of my ass until last night! I know that it may sound extreme, but honestly, the first toilet effect of the MC could be likened to the fire coming out of the back of a rocket when it first blasts off! WHEW! I really thought I was going to be lifted off of the toilet when that powerful explosion of waste came out of my ass! It was violent, explosive, scary and quite shocking! Actually, borderline exciting to know that my body was capable of such a viscous force! So, blasting off was an amazing discovery until about the 5th time. That was when the fire began to kick in.
Guess there can't be a blast off without a bad burn left behind.
It was almost like someone took acid and poured it onto the opening of my ass. This was a miserable experience. When the last dose of this 10oz. concoction went down, I was hoping that it would be over. I couldn't imagine having to do this much longer. The time in between visits to the restroom were now becoming a normal rhythm of life. The acid burning feeling became worse and worse and I was soon seeing a little blood after wiping, but the color of the discharge was beginning to lighten and thin out. I came near shaking every time I had to wipe and began fearing that rumbling feeling in the stomach that sent me running to the bathroom.
At this point, I was so glad that I chose not to go to volleyball!
So, don't plan on doing anything once you start drinking this solution.
make sure to be in a comfortable place that has fast access to a toilet and warn other people that may be sharing the bathroom with you. Your going to need exclusive access at all times!
I finally decided to go to sleep around 11, but my body had other plans. Just as I got comfortable, the "somethings coming whether your ready or not!" began and continued for a couple hours after. To be honest, it would have been beneficial just to remain on the toilet for a few hours.
I finally decided to look up other peoples experiences on the internet and was comforted and entertained to know that I wasn't the only one blasting off during this process! I found some of the comments of others blasting off extremely hilarious, especially because I was experiencing the same phenomenon! I'm actually laughing right now at the thought of the whole blasting off aspect!!!!!!! Amazing!
The last time I looked at the clock it was a little after 2?
I finally went to sleep and woke up knowing that it was blast off time and was dreading the burn. To my surprise, the burn had disappeared! YEAH! A smooth blast off!
So, with all of that blasting off, I had to check the scale to see if there was any perk to that acidic burning pain.
And.............would you know......[drum roll]......................
8 Whole pounds down the drain in 1 night of perpetual blasts offs!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
From this point, the discharge was a clean, light yellow 100% liquid and the burning was over!
The goal is now to get to the colonoscopy location without blasting off on the way. Thankfully, everything went well and made it to the check in point with no accidents! However, when asked by the nurse if I needed the bathroom, I thought it might be a good idea to see if there were anymore launch times.
to my surprise, there was a scheduled launch, but it was tamed down to a light, gentle flow! That chapter of launches was now over! Any other fears of accidents in the operating quarters were all dissolved by the lovely white liquid shot through my IV from the anesthesiologist!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH................. everything from that point on is a wonderful mystery!
This is the perfect gift for your Pokemon Trainer!
